How do you feel about men wearing jewelry? I’m not so much of a fan. Unfortunately for me, my Match date thought it was a great idea. I met Jurassic Jewel Boy at a local brewery. After the obligatory hug I stepped back and immediately noticed his adornments. Not only was he wearing a slice of amber around his neck, but he also had on a petit silver cuff bracelet (which he later revealed to me was etched with a Navajo trail scene - mind you this guy is in his mid-thirties and is blaringly Caucasian). The necklace, he gleefully explained, was suspended by a chain of sliced dinosaur vertebrae – a trinket he picked up on a hiking trip in Utah a few years prior! Amazed that any grown man would wear such artifacts, I asked him to clarify what he did – his Match profile was a little vague. Big Mistake. JJB proceeded to tell me that he works as a salesman for a company that tests for HPV. He then shared with me the procedure for collecting specimens and that he estimated every girl at the bar we were at had HPV whether they knew it or not. He said the only way to avoid it was abstinence and looked to me for some non-verbal affirmation that I was free and clear. Yikes, buddy.
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